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| Thomas P. Lowe | Photo: Opposing Views |
This guy Lowe is low. Not only does he have
sex with his divorce client - professional ethics prohibit this - he sends her fucking bills for it?! [#seewhatIdidthere?] To the tune of $250/hr, no less!
1 Seriously, though, homie better be one hell of a
cocksman. What nerve!
According to Minnesota's
Pioneer Press,
2
Lowe, an attorney since 1985, had known the client for many years. Both are from Valley City, N.D. The woman met with Lowe in August 2011 to discuss pursuing a divorce from her husband.
He agreed to represent her. During a phone call days later, Lowe asked about her sexual relationship with her husband, commented on her appearance and asked if she was interested in sex with him.
The following month, they began an affair that lasted until March.
Well, things went downhill thereafter, and Lowe eventually withdrew ... as her attorney. The damsel in distress then attempted to commit suicide! From her hospital bed, the woebegone woman informed others of the affair and ... cue the Office of Lawyers Professional Responsibility and its moral compass: T-Lowe is charged with "engaging in a sexual relationship with a vulnerable client and billing the client for meetings in which they engaged in sexual relations."
3 He is
suspended from the practice of law for at least 15 months. [This Monkey maintains Lowe should also be charged with prostitution. Lowe The Ho. Think about it. I'll wait ... ]
Anyway, lemme guess - y'all young buck lawyers out there want to know what code our swinging dick used on his timesheets, right? I mean, what exactly is the appropriate description for time spent boinking a client? And is there a 6 minute minimum? Well, apparently, per this LOWEthario, such activity falls under the categories "drafting memos" and/or "meetings" [technically, the latter is quite accurate]. Of course, given the overall circumstances, I think he should've gone with "shafting no-no's" and/or "cheating", but maybe I'm not as gifted in the art of making shit up.
By the way, this isn't Lowe's first trip to the rodeo. He previously received citations from the ethics police for "issues of decorum" - including cussing court employees out and trying to beat down opposing counsel in the courthouse hallway - and in 1997, was placed on probation for using cocaine and buying it from a client.
4,5 [I wish I had known about
that story. Imagine my witty headline: Lowe Blows].
But, to be fair, Lowe is not aLOWEne [I could do this all day - but I won't] when it comes to Minnesota lawyers behaving badly. Indeed, as reported today by the
Star Tribune,
6
Twenty Minnesota attorneys have been disbarred, suspended, publicly reprimanded or placed on probation so far this year. So many lawyers have been disciplined by the Minnesota Supreme Court that the total for 2013 is likely to surpass last year’s 38 actions and could overtake the record of 55 lawyers sanctioned in 1990.
 |
Minnetonka Musing?
Frank Lloyd Wright in 1954 |
And it's only the middle of May. That gives us a rate of one attorney per week wandering afield of the disciplinary code in Minnesota. WTF?! It's that
Lake Minnetonka,
7 I'm telling you. Heck, as far back as 1926, even
Frank Lloyd Wright got arrested for designing a sex scandal with his baby mama up there.
8 And don't get me started on
Prince. [There's the
Purple Rain reference you were waiting for so let's move on.]
Where was I? Oh yeah ... Let this be a lesson to all you baby barristers, if you're ever in Minnesota, stay away from Lake Minne...wait, no, that's not the lesson. Here we go: If you're ever tempted to cross the hypothetical ethical line, don't get caught. ... er ... I mean, don't violate the Rules of Professional Conduct. At the very least, don't go the client's-cash-for-counselor's-cock route; leave that to the pros. Lowe knows.
Signed,
CashMonkey
Note from Editor: DISCLAIMER: There is no empirical proof whatsoever as to the writer's slightly slanderous snark regarding the salacious side-effects of Lake Minnetonka. Please, as always, disregard that dilettantish detour into descriptions of deviant behavior. As our loyal reader(s) know(s), we have very little [read: none whatsoever] control over The Monkeys. Thank you for your patience.
1. Petition For Disciplinary Action Against Thomas P. Lowe, No. A12-1159, (Minn. June 25, 2012)
2. Eagan lawyer suspended; he billed her for time having sex | TwinCities.com | Pioneer Press
3. Order In Re: Petition For Disciplinary Action Against Thomas P. Lowe, No. A12-1159 (Minn. Jan. 10, 2013)
4. See, note 1.E
5. See, note 2;
Attorney Thomas P. Lowe Had Affair With Client, Billed Her for Time Spent Having Sex | Opposing Views
6. Lawyer misconduct: Rising number in Minnesota punished | StarTribune.com
7. Culpepper, three other Vikings charged in boat-party scandal |USATODAY.com
8. Wright jailed in Minneapolis |Star Tribune
