CONFESSION: I'm a Dissofugee.

Not to be outdone by Catherine Zeta-Jones, I've decided I have this: --> Dissociative Fugue Disorder. What?

The primary feature of this disorder is abrupt travel away from home, an inability to remember important aspects of one’s life, and the partial or complete adoption of a new identity.

I'll take it. In a size zero, please and thank you.

Yeah, I'm annoyed. Why? Cuz I'm sick [mental illness is too a sickness, just ask any movie star or auto-tuned blonde] and tired of celebrities getting all the "glory" for what the rest of us have to deal with on a daily basis AND without their assloads of money.

And d'ya know how us regular folk deal? In the absence of agreed-upon healthcare reform? We get Twitter accounts. Seriously. There's a never-ending supply of mentally unstable people on Twitter - present company not excluded - openly discussing the trials and tribulations of dealing with our disorders and diseases, dickhead doctors, mind-numbing meds, and inconsiderate cunts.

But, we're cowards, I guess. And, according to this month's leading mental health expert, Demi Lovato, Catherine is "SO brave." Cuz, you know, outing herself as mildly bipolar is "SO difficult" but! - you'll all be relieved to know - "it's worth it" AND? Dr. Lovato is like, totally "proud of" CZJ. [BTW - anyone else notice how they keep reminding us she only has BPD II? Not to be confused with the "more extreme" version, BPD I. Yeah. Glad we cleared that up. Gawd forBID she be all that kinda crazy.]

What. EVER. Now that bipolarity is en vogue, I've had to go back to the DSM-IV to find some new, unusual, hipster type, synapse-stalling syndrome to claim I'm suffering from such that I can continue to curry concocted compassion for my overall Sociopathologie, also known as, IDGAF Disorder, version I.

Yep, Dissociative Fugue Disorder it is. And, as I told one of our fave Twitter buddies from Oz, Bodachious, we shall call ourselves "dissofugitives" ... "dissofugees" for short. Hell, I might even start up a record label, or a new brand of bath bubbles. I don't know ... the possibilities are endless and right now, I'm busy packing, again [cuz, see, my new disorder involves lots of abrupt travel; new identities; and, if I recall, some memory loss ....] Shit! I just realized! I've been a dissofugee my entire fucking life! Where's Anderson Cooper to coo over ME?!

Signed,


MentalMonkey

ManicMonkey Links:
Dissociative Fugue in Dissociative Disorders | ALLPSYCH Online
Catherine Zeta-Jones back to work after entering hospital to treat bipolar II condition | WSBT
Catherine Zeta Jones Has Bipolar II Disorder -- Demi Lovato Supports Her | People
Zeta-Jones puts public face on mental illness | USATODAY


[Ed. Note: Where to begin? I mean, there are days when it seems impossible to even try and begin to clean up after The Monkeys are finished flinging feces. Allow us to simply deliver our standard disclaimer - we're really not responsible for their abrasive, anti-social and aberrant antics and their opinions are theirs alone. Further, we extend our kudos and condolences ... kudolences? ... to Ms. Zeta-Jones for her courageous decision to bare her brain's bicameral blemish. Now that she's "put a public face" on this disorder, surely others will be spared social stigmatization and suffering. ... I'm sorry ... I just realized we have a meeting to attend. Free donuts!]